Thanksgiving 2011

I wasn't too good this year about posting something every day that I'm thankful for. Mostly because my life the last few weeks has been insanely busy. But through the stressful and emotional moments of the last month or so, I just kept telling myself "you just have to make it to Thanksgiving. If you can make it to Thanksgiving you'll be golden." Well, boys and girls, I made it. And I'm golden.

Because life has been so crazy, I haven't really been thinking much about Thanksgiving itself. And now it's here. Laying in bed this morning it took me only about three and a half seconds to decide what I'm thankful for.

In all my life I have never felt so at home and so welcomed in a group of people as I do in the theatre department at the University of Utah. The awkward transition period was virtually nonexistent. I went, rather quickly, from knowing absolutely no one to having friends in every corner of PAB. I can't walk down the hall of the Performing Arts Building without being mauled down with hugs. It's a great feeling to be accepted and I hope it never goes away.

A huge part of this is thanks to my involvement in Hair. Had I not done Hair I would have only really known the people in my class and not the upperclassmen. The Tribe made my transition to University seamless. I found love in that group of strangers so easily it was astounding. I've never been so sad for a show to close. If I didn't have classes to go to and papers to write all the time, I would definitely be able to perform that show long term. But though the show has closed and we've been forced to move on to other things, the tribe still exists. And I will always be grateful to them.

And because I'm close to those in the tribe, I've become close to other upperclassmen who were not involved in Hair. I've honestly met some of my soul mates in that building and I'm so excited for the next few years with them.

I'm also incredibly grateful for my class. The ATP class of 2015 (that sounds so far away!) is a great group of kids (and a few really old kids). We've gotten really close lately and I'm so excited about our future together. I can't wait to grow, learn and create with these people.

My life isn't perfect. It never is. But when life gets especially imperfect,  it's nice to know that I have a place to call home and a people to call a family.

Life is good.
MJ

"True People"

Auditions came and went. Rehearsals came and went. Opening night came and went. And now it is day two in our eleven show run (plus two previews) and there is a part of me that still can’t believe that Hair is happening to me. One of the most astonishing things to me is that I was this close to not auditioning. I honestly didn’t know whether or not I was going to until the moment I stepped through the door. Auditioning for this show was by far one of the best decisions I have ever made.  

I’ve always heard that being in a production of Hair is life changing. I never was sure why exactly (in fact I’m still not positive why). But it’s truth. The piece isn't perfect. Our production certainly isn't either. It isn’t as polished or as clean as it could be. It’s imperfect. But it’s beautiful in its imperfection. It has definitely been life changing for me.

So what makes Hair so different? The piece itself is unusual. When it opened in 1968 it was ground breaking to the American Theatre world. It completely changed the way people saw and made theatre. The piece leaves room for its creators to improvise and play. To discover. This means that no to productions of Hair have been or will ever be the same. No two “tribes” (for in Hair we are a TRIBE not a cast, another notable difference) ever says the same thing. No two tribes want the same thing. And no two tribes ask the same thing.

Our production in particular been different as well; from the way it was auditioned, to the way it was rehearsed and now to the way it is being performed (you’ll have to come to find out exactly how). We found and created the piece completely organically. Never did the director say “I think this scene should go like this” or “I think by saying this line you mean this.” Everything the audience sees on stage is completely organic and fresh. The love that the audience feels coming from the tribe is not synthetic. It is pure and real.

Truth is something we have striven for from the beginning. Our goal has been to never “show” the audience anything. We do not preach, or teach. We share. We invite each audience into our “home” and live with them for two hours, taking them on a journey with us. Broadway diva Patti LuPone said that “If I [as an actress] am taken to a place honestly the audience is going to receive that, and it will happen to them.”  Though the piece is disconnected, nonsensical and confusing, the audience simply has to feel what we are feeling to understand the message of our piece. We haven’t always hit our target. Finding the truth in the show has been a struggle. But I think we’ve found it. It is tradition for each tribe to choose a name for themselves. Because we have fought so hard to find truth, we chose the name Hach Winik. It means true people.

This has been a growing and learning experience for me both as an actor and as a person. And I think all good theatre does that. As my good friend and fellow tribe member Tia Galanis said, “It was always in the stars.” This tribe has become my family. Three months ago I knew not a single one of them, and now I feel that they have a piece of me that I could never give to anyone else. We became a tribe through a mutual goal of finding something special. And in the end we found was each other.